Coaching and Mediation
“When someone really hears you without passing judgment on you, without trying to take responsibility for you, without trying to mold you, it feels damn good. When I have been listened to and when I have been heard, I am able to re-perceive my world in a new way and go on.”
Carl Rogers
One-on-one coaching may include any or all of the following:
- Receiving deep empathic listening to support self-compassion, clarity and self-empowerment
- Coaching to develop competence in using NVC in one’s everyday life (most effective following a training)
- Transforming guilt, depression and stuckness into self-awareness and life-serving feelings
- Transforming ‘enemy images’ of another, resulting in forgiveness, understanding, letting go
- Preparation for mediation or for a difficult conversation
Coaching/Mediation for couples or groups:
“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place.”
George Bernard Shaw
NVC mediation differs from conventional arbitration in that it seeks connection before solution.
Marshall Rosenberg’s assertion was “I guarantee you that any problem, no matter how longstanding, can be solved within 15 minutes, once connection has been established.” Connection and mutual understanding may take a while, but once reached, possibilities arise that were not present before connection.
The mediator’s role is to support each person to be heard as they intend, i.e. make sure ‘message sent is message received’, not to come up with answers. When there is connection, the goodwill that this encourages is fertile soil for creativity, generosity and co-operation.
Mediation/Coaching is suitable for couples or groups wanting to:
- address a specific current conflict
- heal from past events that have stimulated pain and disconnection
- improve their overall relationship
Mediation participants who whole-heartedly engage in the process can expect:
- Greater connection, harmony, ease, understanding and joy with each other
- Support to let go, forgive and move on from past pain
- Clear, doable, mutually agreeable strategies for resolving conflict with win-win solutions where no one ‘gives up’ or ‘gives in’
- Healing and reconciliation between previously estranged parties
